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RECOVERY
'Are you sick of the blind leading the blind??'
If you would like to take this further, The Mind Works is available on the 'Get Book/Ebook' page (256 pages in length). The paperback price is £11.49/Ebook £5. Aside from costs, £2.55 from each paperback sale goes to the 'Chipmunka Foundation', a charity aimed at 'lifting the lid' on all mental health issues. Average This page is certainly the starting point for recovery, as you will see the main focus is not only to a) show 'how' we can keep our flow, but also b) to understand 'why' we have to stay in flow, as so many of our problems are based on 'over-controlling and coming out of that flow' after we have 'left' it - i.e re any of our discomforting thoughts/feelings. The other point is that illness 'shows itself' in so many ways and it has to be understood that all panic based complaints/over-protecting/obsessive behaviours live in the 'same' family - that is of 'anxiety and tension' ...and that we have a basic lack of understanding of 'how' we should deal with those negative experiences in our lives - we actually go too far in trying to control them - ironically when they've already been controlled subconsciously (ref our cut-offs and primary positive thoughts -see Ch 1 and 5 onwards). In my Advice Column sections, I answer people's queries, who suffer right 'across the range' from 'blushing' to stammers to repetitive hand-washing, to even more drastic fears! So, we have to understand that our negative experiences just get out of hand as the mind is certainly an eventful, intense and creative place. However, 'all' we are doing here is unfortunately 'crossing over the borders' of rationality – we are basically 'trapped' with no way of knowing which way to turn. It really is a frustrating/frightening experience, which, of course, ends up dragging us down further as the trap door closes even further through time with that unresolved anxiety. Date: 9 May 2008 00:49:04 GMT ''Will, I don't know how to thank you. I think you may have saved my life. Your website instantly got inside my head in the way no psychiatrist, psychologist or self-help book ever has. I always struggled to even describe these thoughts to people but you do it perfectly. I couldn't believe it when I read about your 'AIDS panic'. The same thing happened to me. I went for a test and, like you, the result wasn't enough to allay my fears so I went for another one! Thanks again, So, on to the tough stuff! Right, if we can now 'cut to the chase' – there is 'one' thing that always presents itself throughout our problem and that is tension. I have seen many definitions of anxiety/panic and think one of the best terms is that it's 'information that won't go away'. It's also useful to note the phrase about subsequently relaxing...and that this is the clearing of the mind, giving us an effective way of dealing with our anxiety. You will also hear me saying a lot that it's 'not' what comes in to our heads that's the problem, but, actually, what goes out. Indeed, it's when our thoughts have 'come in and gone' that we unwittingly 'revisit' them, thinking we are controlling them when we are actually 'making further issue' of them. Now this is a central part of my recovery and is the 'only' thing that will clear your anxiety and help you flow. So what is this relaxation thing? Well, this is very important to understand, as so many people might say ''well, just calm down/take deep breaths'' etc – but for the panic sufferer – because we don’t really understand what's happening – and the fact that we 'can' be quite stubborn (re control!), we don't really know 'how' to relax, or even agree it's the problem! We think there might be 'something else' out there that is the cause of our illness and that we are odd, weird, or even destined to destruction – this is why our confusion causes so much pain – as ''relax'' to us just means more confusion/panic and inadvertently ends up with us having 'more' forced tension/holding on to our panic. So back to this term – I stress in my book that we can 'only' relax successfully when we 'come out' or 'leave' our natural mind flow (our panic). In more depth – what I am saying is that we have a 'normal' subconscious flow of negative and positive thoughts 'coming into and out' of our heads throughout every second of our existence. We cannot consciously 'do' anything about this – so we have to accept it – and as you will see, explained in more detail – it's when we find the imperfections/pain of this flow to be really discomforting that we ‘take exception’ to these thoughts/feelings and ‘leave’ this natural 'in and out' flow – in search of pain reduction. Everything falls apart as we are simply 'stuck' in a revolving and vicious circle of panic/over-controlling – as mentioned before, that 'information' will not go away – we have no concentration or focus in our lives and think 'nobody' could ever think like 'we' do and so are destined to isolation and destruction – this is not the case though. No matter 'how' mad you think you are - take a look at the Advice Column page, as we 'can', literally think 'anything' - ultra perfectionists/worriers/fantasists/the 'genius' - anything! Of course, it's when we doubt/take exception to those 'initial' thoughts that we actually create that 'holding on to/issue making' problem of them. So, it's 'not' what thoughts we 'have' (however mad, or unsettling) that make us get 'stuck', it's our actual reaction to them. So subtle - and also a real test of self-belief! So, ref over-protecting behaviours, where we 'don't' think we will get control unless we force it home - we are very mistaken here as we 'will' get control in the 'subconscious flow' of our thinking. Again, re my own involvement in sport - I know that it is often said that the 'best' performers have a 'no-think' situation - often called the 'ultimate' thought control/state of focus/concentration. As mentioned above, this is very important to understand for the panic sufferer – our common misconception is that we 'won't' get control of our horrible thoughts/feelings, if we 'don't' consciously 'do' something about them. This is where 'understanding the mind' is so important – as said, we actually get 'more' control in the 'automatic' flowing subconscious moment than at any other time. Not only with the negatives, but also with the positives (i.e 'all' of our thoughts) – our minds 'can' retain these positive thoughts subconsciously 'without' having to consciously and intensely 'hold on' to them and can also 'ditch' the negatives without them becoming 'too' big an issue, but more about that later!! So, this all points to recovery and 'what' is actually required? Suffice it to say and I keep saying that we simply have to 'keep our flow'. Well 'how' can we do this? In my recovery, of course, like so many others, I went from pillar to post thinking ''I've got it, I know what this problem is all about'' - and then, before I knew it, I was back to my terribly depressed, confused state again. However, eventually, I did get to grips with this, just by understanding what was the 'root' of my problem, though it did take a long time as I was pretty much on my own. All I hope is that I can steer you in the right direction and that you will realise that a) total recovery will not happen overnight, as you have accrued some bad habits that will need replacing and b) you also have to appreciate that whilst this solution will eventually 'rid' you of your panic completely – you will have to 'take the pressure off' yourself from thinking everything in life will be painless. We have to realise that we'll 'not' always get things right and that it's OK to feel bad/stressed/confused/mad at times and that we must be 'prepared' to accept this as part of life – warts an’all. Ironically, 'then', we'll be able to move on and 'through' this pain and pick up more positive control as we subconsciously 'learn'. In the Rule of 10 – the last piece in the jigsaw to be explained in detail is the 'panic solution' - ATR – the 'after-tensing' release – no, this is no fancy recovery strategy – it is basically the 'reversal' of our over-reacting to those bygone thoughts and feelings. The fact is, we can 'only' relax successfully WHEN we become 'too' tense, and have, thus, 'left' our natural 'calmer' subconscious flow and entered the 'conscious mind-racing' zone of thought/feeling retrospection. Needless to say, I realised this release was the 'only' way to 'restore' that flow when we have left it – and yes, for the panic sufferer, who may also constantly be anxious/stuck in the repetitive 'loop' of subsequent 'protective' addiction/obsession/checking habits/misdirected forms of fight/flight 'release' – this can be a tough test of 'self-belief' particularly to start with - as the panic 'urge/habit' is so strong. However, the thing that keeps people going further along their recovery during these times, is that this solution 'gives relief'. So it does take 'perseverance and belief', but works basically because of this one fact – it is actually 'harder' to keep panicking as it takes 'more effort' than to stay in flow - and panic is a forced unnecessary overdoing 'reaction'. So, to finish – quite simply ATR is us relaxing, or calming 'back down' to the flow that we have left WHEN we tense up and panic. This is the ONLY time we can truly 'affect' this release, as otherwise, we would be in our calmer, rational, natural flow anyway - and don’t forget, this flow is an imperfect existence of negative and positive flowing thoughts/feelings. If somebody says you should be 'feeling perfectly in positive control' all the time - and I know some people tell me that they feel 'pressured' i.e. when perfectly relaxed meditation cannot be sustained all the time etc – it would be unrealistic to think we could 'force' ourselves to be unnaturally/unrealistically 'one state' controlled all the time – why – because this is just not life, so we should not expect/put ourselves under that pressure to be like this. My work specifically focuses on the fact that we can only 'calm back down' to our flow if we have left it. As said, this is a very important distinction, as so many sufferers keep trying to ‘force’ themselves to relax 'up front' - again as an over-protective measure - which is an impossible task and becomes another ironic 'twist' in our overdoing panic/dragging behind the flow again. So, you will see that ATR is a reparitive/corrective process, because we 'don't' need to 'do' anything if we 'are' in our subconscious state. We 'just' need to 'restore' our flow if/whenever we leave it. It's our intensity/temptation to 'react' to the pains of life that leave us prone to this over-reacting, so we just need to correct this at this 'conscious' panic time. It is not a repetitively spoken process either like ''relax, relax, relax'', as this just further 'increases' our tension/ 'overdoing' panic, but is something we can practice, so we know 'exactly' what 'releasing/letting go' feels like (ref ATR '30 second practice' - Rule of 10). So, our panic and subsequent over-controlling is simply a hypertensive reaction to thoughts that have already gone, which were actually fine. Instead of letting these thoughts 'go', we 'hold on' to them inadvertently by over-tensing up 'unnecessarily' by reacting to them. It's a very alluring trap that soon becomes almost constant, so we have to 'break the chain' by understanding 'what' we're doing. This process DOES give immediate relief from our desperate predicament, as it's based on a common sense appraisal of what is 'actually going on' in our heads when we panic. The Mind Works (Book/Ebook) by Will Beswick A review by Nicki Starkey. The 'National Phobics Society' 23 July 07 (pre ATR-updated 3rd version). 'The Mind Works' is one man's powerful, personal account of his struggles with panic and anxiety…. Beswick also makes it clear how all types of panic and anxiety are related on the panic spectrum, and can manifest themselves in different ways. In his own case, this was in the form of illness phobia whilst at college. Beswick then begins to outline his own theory on how ‘the mind works’. Put briefly, this theory explains that we are either ‘fighters’ or ‘flighters’. Fighters internalise their panic and flighters externalise theirs. Beswick explains how he overcame his panic by realising that his panic was ‘secondary thinking’ - an internal process that was ongoing. He introduces a number of concepts, such as COPAST- concept of primary and secondary thinking. These are explained in great detail with examples to demonstrate their meaning. As the reader, we are gradually encouraged to find faith in our natural coping abilities..…The author uses a number of diagrams and workable examples for the reader to attempt. He also includes a number of responses to e-mails from readers of his own website (www.doyoupanic.co.uk) where he clarifies any points raised about his theories. It also means that he can tailor his answers to particular phobias or types of anxiety and explain how they work.... The author has also included contributions from other therapists, such as John Crawford’s explanation of OCD, which I also found very helpful. As well as this, he provides links to helpful articles, and opens the discussion up to include related subjects such as eating disorders and medication, and how these relate to his theories. Overall I was very impressed with the content and layout of this book.. it is written in a way that will help many readers to rationalise what they are experiencing and help them to look at the issues in a new light. It uses good examples, positive language and a personal approach that will strike a chord with many readers.... Nicki On Mon 11/05/09 9:33 PM , Brian sent: Hi Will, thank you so much for replying to me. I just wanted to tell you that since my last "desperation" email, I had a great realization while reading your book that I really believe has brought me back to the present.....What brought me back to the present was a quote on one of the last pages of your book. The quote is "Just 'think' what you think...don't force yourself to think." Reading that quote made me realize how hard I had been trying to recover by "forcing" all of the methods of recovery in my head. I was thinking so hard about what you and Paul say, and I wasn't just allowing my normal thoughts to flow, instead, I was further 'intensifying' and 'breaking' the flow. I am feeling so much better now - much like I did when I first found Paul's website a year ago, and I can tell it is just going to get better for me as time goes on. I wanted to share this with you just to let you know the impact you have had on my life. Thank you so much, your doing a great thing, and I know so many people are grateful for that. Thank you, Brian
'What tends to 'happen' with recovery? Well, we 'then' tend to 'even' out and 'iron' out those intense-based extremes of self-doubt, hate, fear, excess worry, over-aggression, selfishness, low energy, negativity, inflexibility, being judgemental etc etc etc, all 'as part' of the happier/moving forward us, albeit 'in' the moment. In addition we tend to 'trust' and 'go with' our senses far more often’ "Hi Will, I've just finished reading your book, which was from Paul Davids Anxiety No More Website. Your teachings make so much sense, just like Pauls accepting method. Your book has taught me that its ok to think how i think, its not the thoughts causing my suffering- its my reaction to them...I know now exactly what i have to do, and its fine to have any thoughts as the brain is capable of thinking anything, and it is only a harmless thought. I know i just need to learn not to obsess, fight, investigate thoughts then i wouldnt get the the 'fight or flight' panic response anyway. Thankyou for your time, I think your work is amazing" Candie 25th May '08. Hi Will, My name is Mark, I am 41 years old. I purchased your book around Christmas time. I have only just read it as I was completeing a course of CBT for anxiety. I have suffered from anxiety for most of my life, usually surrounding health anxiety. About four years ago it went up a notch and I started to get abhorrent thoughts involving all sorts of violence and of a sexual nature. I was very ill for a while but recovered and the thoughts subsided. Last September my lovely wife became pregnant and they all kicked off again and I was poorly again, hence the course of CBT. I completed the CBT and was much better but still suffering especially since my lovely daughter was born 8 weeks ago. My therapist who was very supportive says its down to me and I have the tools to succeed. I read your book and found it brilliant, I could have saved myself 100s of pounds in therapy bills... Your story seems remarkably like mine and your recovery gives me hope. You are right this is a terrible illness and I thank my lucky stars I have lots of support and I am able to hold down a high pressured job. Cheers Will Mark May '09
Date: Thu, 1 Jan 2009 19:03:14 +0000 Hi Will Well what a difference the last few months have made! I am now in flow- 99% of the time i feel no need to repeatedly think anything! I no longer ruminate and even see how irrational i was once been. Its amazing how panicking can cloud or judgement and make us so irrational. I still have the odd setback, but thats fine as this is new habits overwriting old ones that consumed my every thought for two years! I really was that bad i was constantly testing myself with thoughts, my mind was on alert scanning for any thought that may threaten me... i supose i was forcing myself to confront something that didnt need clarifying. Thankyou for all your help Will- i now have a bright future to look forward to- i am expecting my first baby in June, a year ago this wouldnt of been an option due to fearing my own mind! Hope you had a lovely christmas and all the best for 2009. Dee ..Fantastic news and well done! All the best for 2009 and remember - if times ever get tough, you know where I am, but it seems like youre starting to 'get this'.cheers Will 08/04/10 Hi Will, Many thanks for sending this to me. I am currently getting through your book and am finding it really good. I have also read Paul David's book and so far am finding that "The Mind Works" kind of explains the actual "accepting" and "not doing anything" principals in a way that helps you to understand it more from a brain process way, which is good. It seems strange sometimes that what seems to be such an easy process is so hard to actually get the hang of. I have had Anxiety notably from the age of 17 (Starting with a Panic attack which threw me into a pit of despair) and I am now 38. Following coming on and off Paroxetine (Seroxat) many times over the years, and I can't deny that when on it, it did help. I have now come off at 1mg per month for 20 months and finally stopped on 1st November 2009. 4 Months on and I am really struggling (Very Anxious and Depressed). We have had some hard times thrown at us lately and I am finding it difficult to make even simple decisions. My GP has prescribed a different SSRI, Sertraline if I want it. The thing is I really don't want to start taking any more medication. I believe I have made more progress over the last year or so than ever with Acceptance techniques like in "The Mind Works", "At Last a Life" and Clare Weeks books.....
Hi Will, Just going through your book now and so far its been fantastic. The way you identify the process in which the thoughts go is very good. I know you might not give put personal adivce but i'll ask my question anyway. My biggest fear with anxiety is depression and because i have felt depressed abit with my anxiety and it is always on my mind this is usually what my thoughts are about and what my 'What ifs' are about most of the time. So when i get that random thought "do i feel depressed" is that my primary thought and i should just cut-off from there? Because i ususally get myself in a panic and think what if this is me forever ect ect. Or if i hear the word depression or read it somewhere the dread washes over me and the thoughts begin to come. In saying this my anxiety started with physical symptoms which began with a panic attack and then developed into constant anxiety from waiting for the 'next' panic attack. I have feared going crazy, all other mental illnesses under the sun and i spose the depression fear is the one ive had the longest. I like how you mentioned people doubt the good positive thoughts and question them too, because i frequently do this. Thanks again for sending me your ebook i look forward to continue reading it Kind regards Stephen On Sat 1/11/08 7:36 PM , Gemma sent: Hi Will, I'm incredibly impressed with your website, and feel so pleased that others out there have experienced similar feelings/thoughts that I have. I've suffered on and off with anxiety for much of my life. I found cognitive behaviour therapy great as a teen, but a couple of years later I developed new fears/worries that I was unsure of how to deal with. I started seeing a psychologist just to talk really, which helped slightly. A few years on, I'm tired of wondering over and over whether my problem is chemical/emotioal/based on some childhood experience. Regards,Gemma On Tue 2/09/08 2:35 PM , Simon sent: Hi Will. I have been suffering from anxiety and panic for over a year now, but have only found out what it was 3 months ago when it got really bad. When i left uni i was getting palpatations, chest pains and dizziness. They carried on until Christmas when i was so convinced that there was something wrong with my heart that i went to the docs and underwent numerous tests. In the spring of this year the doctor finally told me there was nothing wrong with me. Thats when i had my first panic attack and the anxiety started - endless thrashing around my mind for answers and thinking i was going crazy. I was prescribed Diazepam and sent to a counsellor. I found your website and also have been using anxietynomore.com. It has helped me get tremendously and i believe i am on the road to recovery. The physical symptoms of anxiety and panic no longer scare me and i have learnt how to control them. However, what i am at pains to beat is the mental anguish. It is nowhere near as bad as it used to be when i had a one track mind and no intetrest in the world and experienced depersonalisation. Instead it is the disturbing and negative thoughts which keep coming and preventing me finally beating anxiety. On Tue 19/08/08 6:42 PM , Aaron sent: Hi Will I purchased your book online and, as I am travelling out of the country Thursday, have downloaded it on my laptop. Your site is great. Given me some hope that I can get out of this mess! Many thanks Aaron On Thu 14/08/08 4:57 PM , "Chris"sent: 17th July 08 hi will i have so far liked what ive read from your site but ive had a few false dawns in the past so i dont want to get excited as ive just purchased the ebook from you.i hope you dont mind me asking but any advice before i start to read it as ive stated ive suffered anxiety problems for 12 years mainly free floating anxiety and ocd thoughts and have had many set backs.cheers chris The reason I like your book is because it comes from a very different angle, something that helped me to be honest, even when 'recovered' I On Wed Mar 21 22:35, 'Susan G' sent: Will, I got your book last week and have really been helped by it. My anxiety has been bad my entire life, and today, due to the journals, I was able to go out to eat, shopping, get ice cream, and to the movies, out of town with friends, with absolutely no problems... It would probably amaze people to know how anxious I get because I appear to be very outgoing and high energy, but it's sad how anxious behaviour can make your world smaller and smaller because you don't want to take chances with it. I hope to hear from you. :) I'm just amazed at how you were able to break it down simply into a process that everybody can do. The book is a great tool in the recovery process. Mar 07 ..And 2 years since first contact with this site. On Wed Nov 7 16:35 , 'Nick Watts' sent: Hello Will Going really good thanks, Better than ever!! Looking forward to reading the paperback this time round! Thanks again Will, for all the help that you gave me. Nick Hi Will, Just wanted to thank you for your book! I'm recovering from obsessive panic, and you're so right about the whole panic process! I am also very inspired by the works of Eckhart Tolle (The Power of Now & A New Earth). Do you know him? He basically teaches the same thing for people in general. To become aware of your thoughts/feelings without clinging on to them. We are not the thinker, we are the awareness behind the thinker. It's such a relief knowing that ;) Many thanks Anja, Holland. May 23, 07 Tue Jul 10 21:33 - Many thanks for this Will. It's a superb piece of work and 100% relevant to the problems I face and have faced for many long years. The primary/secondary thought concept is really helpful and I'm committed to applying it into my everyday thinking. Many thanks once again. Jon On Tue Oct 16 8:26 , C sent: Hi Will, i found your site via paul david's website and it makes for interesting reading. One thing that i cant seem to find an answer for is my thought patterns. i recently moved house and at the time, i didnt realise that it being dormer meant upstairs was made of wood. On Mon Sep 3 12:00 , pdavid@anxietynomore.co.uk sent:Thanks for the feedback Will. I have actually just finished updating it as I keep getting new questions asked to me and I want to cover everything. I wanted people to really connect with this understanding. All the books I read apart from Claire weekes, I could never relate to. There is some influence from Claires books, but to be honest although I understood, I never made it work for me. So, I, like you sort of developed my own way through trial and error and helping others. It sort of all clicked into place, this is why I could connect with yours, I don't go for all that do this, do that. I also would rather people 'not do' in a way that they don't become a slave to how they feel, to not make it the centre of their day. On Wed Jul 11 15:44 , Charlotte Haigh sent: Dear Will I wonder whether you can help? I came across your fantastic website while On Mon Dec 3 10:10 , SK (assumed name requested) sent: Hi Thanks for your reply. It really means a lot to have someone to discuss this with as it is a subject that is so hard to talk about especially as it doesn't really make a lot of sense a lot of the time. I'm now trying to put your advice in to action and already felt a certain amount of weight has lifted over the past few days. Its still hard as these thoughts still enter my head which I suppose is something that I'm always going to wish could just disappear instantly but as you said it is the way we react which is the problem so I have just been focusing on letting them go instead of trying to tackle them or figure them out. Its already made things a lot easier and though there are occasions when it seems to creep back, I'm just trying to focus on how well i'm doing and the positives instead of focusing on the negatives. Hopefully over time as you say the negative thoughts will fade away a bit as i'm not making such a big deal of them and the positives can start coming in instead. Thanks again so much for your help as just having some reassurance is so helpful and has helped me realise that a lot of this is about having confidence in myself and not doubting my abilities. Feel free to use any correspondance as I'd like to think that I might be able to offer some reassurance that people are not alone just like you have yourself but I would prefer to remain anonymous if this is ok. Its a pity things like this are not more out in the open as i'm sure it would help so many people that think they are the only one's dealing with this. Thanks again! Message: I just wanted to thank you for putting my site as a link to yours www.anxietynomore.co.uk. When you replied to me I sensed a nice genuine person and decided to take a further look at your website. Will I am very impressed and from someone who recovered and studied the subject for many years, I see a person who is very knowledgeable on the subject and you have some very good ideas. I get many people asking me questions and visiting my site and although I do sell the book I wrote on my recovery, my main motivation is helping people and the rewarding feeling I get from this. The sale of the book helps me to help people by going part-time, freeing up my time to concentrate on the site and answering emails. Message: On Wednesday when I received the new journals, particularly journal 4, I started to read it and seen my correspondance in, then i read your reply to my last e mail. I just thought about it for a couple of days and It clicked. Now it obvious. *ANYTHING* that goes on in my head, feelings anxiety thoughts *WHATEVER IS FINE* as long as you don't question, doubt.... N June 06 Message: Well..after many many years of thinking I was weird, I had a BIG mental problem, I suddenly stumble over a site that in a few simple lines cleared my mind and made sense of everything.. 'anticipatory thinking'. Thankyou Will, for taking all the flounce and baggage out of this :) I too would say my character is like yours, my gp calls me one of 'lifes sensitive people' :) which I don't mind, especially as I now can handle my thinking ... Jan 1.03.06 (see full message on 'Comments' page) Name: NW Your method works! I have isolated the process....(also part of 'Advice Column 2' entry - answered in Journal 4) 02.06 Name: Sam D 23.5.05 Message: This is by far THE best site that I have come across where I can really understand what I am doing.. Everywhere else seems to be so general, but this is me all over and it's really helped me today. Thanks Name: Emma 4.05.06 Message: I am very impressed with this site. I have not finished reading it yet but so far it seems to explain how I'm feeling. I have been suffering with this problem for over 7 years, and have various therapies, medication also without really getting the answer I want. This site is so special as is from someone who has been there, are rather than other sites that try and make money out of peoples suffering is truly trying to help and spread the word, excellent! Name: Jo S. You have obviously worked very hard on these (re: journals). I now feel I have a very clear understanding as to what I'm doing. Not only should you be credited with your own recovery, but also your ability to tell this as simply as possible. Many, many thanks. 21.04.06 Name: Mike S. I was anxious about receiving your journals - as you'll know - we want to read everything anyway. Thankfully, your argument is consistent throughout, whilst being appied to people's different situations, I'm starting to get this... Jun 06 Name: Rob Hi Will Thanks for your journals. I have started reading them. I may record my progress for my own benefit and if you wanted to, to add to the journal? I already have one question - your writing is great by the way (that was a compliment, not the question): although I am very alike you (not many men admit they panic)... see also 'Advice Column 2' section. July 06 Wills theory works. After reading peoples accounts, people are getting too confused :- Leave your head and sort it out. It's your panic that's the problem, don't get confused with your negative state. The panic IS the problem. This panic explaining is the 'separate' process, it's where you constantly/consciously question, eg, this is not right, what if, what, when, why, questions fly. Everything else in your head is fine. Just avoid the panic. It does come but it will take time. See the panic and avoid it. Message: Will - this is, indeed, a very private illness - one which keeps us trapped unless we figure it out for ourselves, as I agree, no-one really seems to know what they're on about. Until now. You have thrown this subject wide open - I couldn't believe what an impact just a few words could have. If you've not been there - it's always hard to know - but you do and, more importantly - you have figured it. Please champion your cause as this site/journals are gold. Yours.... Kurt F... July 06 Message: What you're saying here is that there's a way for us all 'to be' and as long as we don't 'deviate' from this, we'll cope and move on in life. Not so sure how long it took you to do this ? Regards Abid H July 06 (see Journal' 6 - Advice Column 'Learning To Trust Ourselves') Hi Will Just wanted to say thanks for the journals (re 5). I had a really rough time last night and to open this, this morning has made me realise that there are others out there and I'm not on my own. Thanks for everything and keep up the good and hard work. Danielle Aug 06 Hello Will things going very well.really starting to get at ease with myself. Still get times where i feel panicky or stressing about whether its right or not. But i now Know that that is primary thoughts. What happens now After a while it builds up until the point where i think Right PANIC Fight to sort out this session. I then Know not to fight. Then its gone. Then its good again. Now i know that panic usually sorts it out. Once i think right panic and don't then it gets better. At the moment I am starting to get weeks of good, and only days of panicky so we are getting there. Now sometimes i forget completely about it for hours and then remember it again . Before i used to panic then Because i thought it was back again. Now I think oh yes and thats that. It is so simple ie the process is very easy to define once you realize what is is.I was reading the new journal about that woman Ann?, getting lots of negative thoughts over and over. thats ok just run with it however long it lasts. She might be like that for days even weeks but it will pass and she will start to think more positive. I understand it fully now. Thanks Will , keep in touch. NW Aug 06 Hello Will I have been thinking. I am further down the road than I give myself credit for. I cannot panic any more. its now ingrain . No matter what thought i get or how panicky I get I cannot fight. Its subconscious. As i am not doing it any more. I get panicky about whether the theory is correct. as it is so good. But the panicky times always develop to a point, then its gone. It`s strange. Time will tell and in all honestly time is one thing I have got. Thanks N Aug 06 (see also Journal 6) Message: Gotta hand it to you Will, this has really turned me around. You're journey is not only inspiring, but your grasp on this has given me the understanding that I can deal with my intense mind -WITHOUT panic. Your journals were a natural follow-on for me. - though I thought I had gotten it all in. No need to panic here!! - your argument follows through each one and left me feeling clear how to approach this through all those sufferers' ails. Yours Kit S Aug 06 Hi Will, thanks for these (Updated journals and Journal 4). I am actually doing much better and can really see an improvment in how i am handling things and with time really think this could be the answer for me. Thanks again for all your support, i realised now that i do know what i am doing to an extent and have to trust myself more without obsessivly questioning if i am confused about the theory behind it. I would still like to receive the journals but at the moment am trying stick at not fighting anything and think will look into the theory more when i am feeling more habitual about this. But i really do think this could be the answer to it all, i just do feel more in the flow now but am really having to try still till it becomes more natural. Im not sure if i told you already but i actually work in the mental health 'field' (the irony hey!) but i do agree that your theory of recovery could relate to many other mental health problems, trying to gain control and understanding. Again many thanks, it is really refreshing this approach. So i am being more patient now and realising it will not happen over night and that i have a long history of anxiety to break away from. If you don't mind im sure when i do read into the theory side of it i will have some more questions to ask! Thanks again, you have been a great help, Anna (assumed name used here) Hello Will Message: Hi Will, Thanks for your great website. I just ordered the journals, when can I expect them? Anna Oct 06 Hi Will, I feel so low and it seems like every day I spend trying to figure out this mental knot. Every day I feel like I am completely out of control and my thinking makes no sense anymore. One day I may decide I'm going to be very disciplined about exercising, relaxation and doing instead of thinking etc and then two days later I give up already. There seems no way out...I am just so scared that this obsessing (ocd/anxiety) is here to stay and that I'm not going to be able to function in the 'music industry' which is stressful of course but it is my dream. Hi Will u really have done a wonderful job with this site. I come to think that this site is too good to be true. u make it very easy for me to be in your shoes. It is as if u can read my mind sometimes. I am 28 and I live in Greece. I have experience some panic attacks a year ago, but with the help of antidepressant i have somehow overcome the physical symptoms. Although i don’t feel that i have recover because i think i have not change the thinking patterns that have forced me into this mess. And the thinking patterns are very close to what u describe in your site. Although these patterns have helped me to finish college and do my masters they don’t seem to be very helpful with managing your feelings. On the contrary they can lead to a complete wreck. I would be grateful if u can help me by sending me this material. The postal order is the most convenient way for me to pay. Please let me know how this can be done. I ll be 'anxious' to hear from u S.U DEC 06 Hi, I subscribed to your site for the journals yesterday. I found the website very informative and am hopeful it will help with my panic and anxiety which I have been suffering from on and off for the past five years but has got much worse in the past year which has led to agoraphobia. Regards RN DEC 06 Will, Many many thanks for your journals which have certainly cleared a lot of things up. Like so many of your readers - I understand now how this illness keeps re-inventing itself as we are compelled to keep 'doing' something about our predicament - which, of course, is the actual 'cause' of this illness. Completely clear to me that I need to 'hold off'. In debt! Many thanks once again - just a suggestion - why don't you hold a conference about all of this? Mel A Dec 06 Hi Will - Just a quick note to say 'well done' for all your efforts with this site. I picked it up about 6 months ago - thought it was excellent, but didn't really have enough courage to 'look outside' my compulsion at that time. One thing that 'did' stick was your comment about 'cut-offs', as this was totally new to me. However, one day I was driving and feeling really panicky -and I thought 'as I recognised this' - am I 'cutting-off' here? I 'twigged' that there was no need to follow this up and it all became clear. On reading your journals - a revelation I would say, as this has really taken me on as I knew this was realistic and truthful. I am intense and yet realise now that I can work through this and have more confidence than ever that I can be me. Hope this helps people see how you are affecting others. Many thanks Jay Dec 06 Will, many thanks for this. Hope you don't mind, but you have some gutsy people out there! Like you, they selflessly include 'all' their pain and, of course, all the stigma that goes with showing 'what really goes on in all our minds- but we'd never like to admit'. Good on ye! That Nick Watts guy needs applauding - patience and perseverence BUT belief. I have a great job - a high flyer I will admit myself - but a complete wreck if the truth be known. Your site has given me access without walls - and the confidentiality I need. Hopefully here, I have given a little bit back - though please only use my first name! Gareth Jan 07 Hi Will. I have just purchased your journals and am looking forward to reading them and help me along the road to full recovery. I must admit i admire you and the work you have done to recover and help others, good on you. I just hope i can do the same as i have been suffering for about a year now. Its hard and i do try not to go at the thoughts but it just overwhelming sometimes and/or confusing. kind regards Nic Feb 07 Mon Jul 9 12:35 , pdavid@anxietynomore.co.uk sent: Hi Will,
Message: Great site, nicely put together...just like to add something, being a smoker does not stop you having panics, oh that it did :).... Well done keep up the good work.. Paulette (Therapist for HOPE - Help Overcome Panic Effects)
Name: Sam D 23.5.05 Message: This is by far THE best site that I have come across where I can really understand what I am doing.. Everywhere else seems to be so general, but this is me all over and it's really helped me today. Thanks
Name: Cynthia 28.5.05 Message: I just got hold of this site from a friend.. I agree with your 'solution' as very much a 'fear of fear' and accepting all feelings. Will read on to understand what you mean by the 'process'.
Name: Jodie Finnegan 11.6.05 Message: I think you may have hit on something quite 'big' here. I have looked into this problem and have not seen any detail for 'the process of panic....' quite like this. I agree there may be similarities with other illnesses and your concept of 'unconscious thought'.
Name: Alex Jones 18.8.05 Message: This is an excellent site, with lots of useful tips, although maybe too much to take in, in one go. I agree, 'allowing' natural controls rather than 're-checking' them has wonderful results!
Name: Tom 24.8.05 Message: Dear Will - I have recently created a site entitled Anxiety2calm.com which looks at various therapies and quick fix cures which are offered or sold to sufferers of anxiety, panic attacks, and phobias. Throughout the site I urge the sufferer to be wary of expensive gimmicks that make unsubstantiated promises. Name: Marco 24.8.05 Message: Hi Will - Great site! http://www.clarocet.com & http://www.anxiety-and-depression-solutions.com Name: Liz :) 27.9.05 Message: Hello Will. Just reading your site! Fabulous! Can you tell me if you had been on meds prior to your healing? I have constant anxiety and have just started AD's and xanex. Thanks! Liz :) (Recent e-mail, which Liz was also happy to put on this page!) The rest of this conversation is detailed in Journal 2, in the 'Advice Column'. Name: Daniel L 4.10.05 Message: Hi Will Very interesting website. I wanted to inquire about the subscription & what I receive, i.e journals etc. Also, I'm interested in what you mean that you have recovered?? Don't you have the panic/anxiety symptoms?? I am very interested in subscribing. Look forward to hearing from you. Regards Daniel Name: Janice M 2.11.05 Message: I have enjoyed your site and would like to suggest a link exchange. Although separated by the Atlantic, you and I are connected as fellow sufferers of panic and anxiety. My site began as a labor of love, but has grown and I would be honored to offer it to you as a resource. www.stop-anxiety-attack-symptoms.com
Name: Marc Message: I suffered with panic attacks in my teens but some how through prayer Name: Anon - Can you help? Message: you seem to be so confidant getting through all of this i am jammed Name: Val E Message: An excellent, excellent take on fight or flight. ps can you tell me how much the journals cost US $. Many thanks Jun 06 Name: Paul David Message: Hi Will, Keep up the good work! Regards Paul July 06
Comment: This site - what a breath of fresh air! Reading this website in itself made me feel calmer. I suffer with anxiety and panic, to a more frightening degree over the last 2 years or so. However, with help from various people and learning coping techniques I am finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. Panic is a cycle that 'can' be broken and for me, is leading to a better outlook of myself and the world.
** Please note - I will try to respond to all your e-mails re: the site/book as quickly as possible, but this obviously depends on the volume I receive at the time.
Do You Panic? Awarded 5* by the UK Mental Health Foundation - A Personal Case Study in Recovery From Obsessive Panic & Anxiety. Further notes from this site:- DY Panic 1. Panic - Anxiety can be cured. DY Panic 2. Panic recovery is based on understanding our 'reaction' is the real problem. DY Panic 3. This panic process is one of 'fighting or flighting' - ie we fight to regain control 'actually' after it has happened/or run away from the 'threat' AFTER it has actually passed - as a result - we're stuck in panic, because we are trapped in a 'no win' situation. DY Panic 4. Many e-mails keep coming in re- 'letting go' and confusion surrounding this. Remember 'panic or anxiety' is when we try to force 'control/running away'. Now, the misconception here is that 'letting go' means 'letting go of all controls'. This is 'wrong' because we don't have to do this as we 'can' get control - see primary 'positive' controls at bottom of recovery page. DY Panic 5. 'Momentary' panic/anxiety can happen 'initially', like for everyone, but if we react - it becomes prolonged/frequent and repetitive. DY Panic 5. Panic Anxiety - there are 2 different 'reactions' - we can fly or fight - mine was a 'fight' response very cosely associated with 'perfectionist' character type. An internalised reaction. Flighter panic is very much an externalised 'more visible' emotional loss of control - see actions of the Flighter i.e. CHAPS 2, 3, 4, 5, 7 and 8. DY Panic 6. Panic Anxiety Reason why this is so confusing is we can't separate real 'primary' control and 'secondary' overcontrol - it is a very fine line. Nevertheless - I have separated the exact process - the difference between primary and secondary thinking IS this CONSCIOUS fighting OR flighting process, which then brings destructive panic. DY Panic 7. Panic Anxiety. Awarded 5* by the UK Mental Health Foundation - panic 'sets in' we erroneously force control 'after' natural cut-offs have dealt with..no need for panic. DY Panic 8. Panic Anxiety - you can only get 'focus' in your life, when you accept you ARE different to 'anyone' else. Then you can accept there is no need to 'question or run' if you have 'true' self-confidence. Panic Anxiety is very similar as you question/flight from your 'initial' thoughts. Don't be mistaken - as my study shows - this is not the only thing you question - you also question/run from/ignore your initial positives as well as negatives - but many of us don't see this. That's why panic is still a problem when we 'let go' as we think this means 'loss of all control', but this is 'forced' behaviour yet again - as there is a natural ability to accept positives without reacting to them - but this 'comes to us' NOT 'us to it'. DY Panic 9. Panic Anxiety The purpose of the book is to give sufferers the chance to 'follow this understanding through' with more specific examples from my experiences and others' recovery. Clarification is, of course, important for all the fighter type perfectionists/confidence building to accept who we are i.e. our initial thinking IS ok (ref also flighters). DY Panic 10. Panic Anxiety - when you are low, stressed, depressed etc - these are the threats to your very existence as a perfectionist/flighter. Hence, the reason why 'understanding' where 'real' control comes in, is imperative in our recovery from prolonged/frequent panic anxiety - |
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