Understand Anxiety

Awarded 5* by the UK Mental Health Foundation

 There are many of us who suffer from anxiety at some point in their lives. For me, this started in my teens, but now I that understand the condition so much more and I also realise there was a strong tendency in me to feel anxious, as I naturally had an intense mind.

This doesn't mean that I would always suffer by the way, but nevertheless, I had to understand 'why' I suffered from crippling anxiety, and how I could do something to resolve it.

During my time at University, severe relationship stress set off a massive downtun in my happiness - something so strong that I couldn't control it, no matter how hard I tried.

This is the 'thing' with anxiety - you can easily fall into the 'trap' of trying too hard to fight it - this then leads to further anxiety in 'combat mode'...or panic over-controlling.

The aim of this website is to outline why we suffer and subsequently 'how' we can learn to deal with our stresses 'without' going into that combat mode.

Understanding is key - so that when you feel anxious or in discomfort - it's imperative that you don't chase for answers in that combat phase. This can be the typical search for answers in your head - I also refer to it as forced - because it's actually easier to take our foot 'off' the pedal rather than follow the urge to force back on to a thought.

***See Diary of Recovery (bottom of Simply Put page)

- this is how you can proactively start to reduce the amount of stress spikes that make your life so intolerable - this is also part of the Advice service that I offer, as has the lady who detailed her typical day in a 20 minute period (maybe then you won't think youre that bad!)!

Summary - The Mind Works

1. The Primary Process: The "Spike"

• What it is: A natural, physiological survival response to stress, sadness, or even high arousal like excitement.
• Why it happens: The nervous system senses a threat (or mismatch between how things are and how a perfectionist feels they should be) and dumps adrenaline or tension into the body.
• The trap: Because it feels uncomfortable, the mind frames the spike itself as a problem that must be immediately fixed.

2. The Secondary Process: "Forced Thought" (The Fight)

• What it is: Compulsive over-analysis, rumination, and internal debate aimed at "flattening" the discomfort.
• Why it backfires: This secondary process requires active mental effort. Even though it feels like problem-solving, it signals to your brain that you are in active danger. This feeds more fuel back into the threat response, keeping you stuck in high gear for hours or days.

The Breakthrough: "Taking Your Foot Off the Accelerator"

For a perfectionist, the instinct when feeling tension is to do more—more searching, more analyzing, more control.

The realization that you can simply disengage the effort (taking your foot off the pedal) changes the game:

1. It separates feelings from actions: You allow the biological "spike" to sit in the passenger seat without letting the "forced thought" drive the car.
2. It requires continuous release, not a one-time fix: The urge to analyze will keep popping back up. Taking your foot off the pedal isn't something you do once; it's a practice of repeatedly releasing the mental effort every time you notice yourself gripping tightly again.
3. It accepts non-perfection: Healing the cycle means accepting that taking your foot off the gas won't immediately make the tension vanish. It just stops adding new tension to the existing pile.

This distinction between the automatic feeling and the forced effort to fix it is often the exact turning point in breaking long-term anxiety and burnout cycles.

 'The panic IS the problem, I just cannot do it any more' Back cover testimony - Nick Watts

By tuning in to my Youtube channel doyoupanic@6089 you will hopefully start to understand the processes by which we panic and then we can start to deal with the 'over-control' that often follows on from anxious thoughts and feelings.